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Funny-manpages. Консольный юмор.

Дата публикации: May 3, 2010, 12:13 a.m.
Теги: юмор,
Автор: Brainsburn

Funny manpages

funny-manpages и asr-manoages - коллекции юмористических man страничек, собранных с различных источников. Установив funny-manpages, вы сможете прочитать о протоколе передачи пива по сети, о том, как правильно посылать RTFM, узнаете о тайном ключе -R команды echo и др.

ВНИМАНИЕ: эти ман странички будут интересны только тем, кто знает английский!


В наличии:
man 6 baby
man 6 celibacy
man 6 condom
man 6 date
man 6 echo
man 6 flame
man 6 flog
man 6 gong
man 6 grope
man 6 party
man 6 rescrog
man 6 rm
man 6 rtfm
man 6 sex
man 6 strfry
man 6 tm
man 6 uubp
man 6 xkill
man 6 xlart


В наличии:
man 5 normality
man 2 people
man 8 guru
man 8 pwsd
man 8 bosskill
man 8 knife
man 8 nuke
man 8 luser
man 8 ctluser
man 3 chastise
man 1 lart
man 1 think
man 1 sysadmin
man 1 whack
man 1 c
man 1 slave

man 6 party
PARTY(1)                                                              PARTY(1)

       party - set OS responses mode

       party ON|OFF|WHEREIS [ - ] dnv

       Operating   systems  being  what they are,  the admin people can easily
       grow tired of  command responses that  resemble  dyslexic  eugene-speak
       filtered    through    Kernighan    and    Ritchie's  collective  back-
       brains.  To alleviate this, we have included a slightly  more  `casual'
       mode,   in   which  the  responses to all commands  are  first filtered
       through  a  customising  routine (DUDE) , which  makes  them   sound  a
       little  more   friendly while retaining their  full  information   con‐
       tent  (usually).   The rooted(c) system prompt is   changed  to   `What
       now,  dude?' and output from each command is terminated by `No problem,

       -v     Verbose mode  (ALL commands  have  a `verbose' mode). When  this
              option is  present,  all filtered responses are  preceeded  by a
              message: `This response has been parsed by the DUDE  filter  and
              is not intended to be some sort of sleazy come-on.'

       -d     Don't    restart    all    processes    after   recompiling  the
              /uselss/libs/eugene file (see below).   This alows any important
              tasks to complete beforehand.

       -n     Notify  all  users  that  they  are about to be force-logged out
              and force-logged in again.

       ON     Activates the DUDE filter.

       OFF    De-activates the DUDE filter.

              Doesn't do anything, but we couldn't resist it.

       %-)  party on

       What now, dude?

       To compare  the differing responses, here is  output  provided  by  the
       ispi -s command, with party OFF and party ON:

       party OFF

       line     who       why                         how long
       000      rooted    that's you, dweeb!          epoch
       00F      wp        she's supposed to be        0:44:12
                          typing up the end of
                          financial year report,
                          but she's been doing her
                          resume when she thinks
                          no-one is watching
       014      maint     playing games, as usual     0:51:16

       party ON

       Well,   let's  see  who's  on, eh?  There's you, of course, on line 000
       (Imagine that!  Hahaha!)  Oh look,  on serIOus  line  00F,   it's  that
       cute  little  secretary  -  looks like she's lost her keyboard template
       again, she's been hitting the escape key for  the  past  five  minutes!
       AND   OF   COURSE,  the   guys  down in maintenance are playing `cosmic
       ballcrushers'.   As  usual.   Well,  who   else,   um,   no-one  really
       interesting  like,   ya  know,  oh hang on,  DTR is toggling on serIOus
       line 03D.. oh, no problem, it's that stuffed  modem  again.   You  want
       maybe  I should send  some AMail to maintenance  and get 'em to look at
       it?   No problem, dude.

       What now, dude?
Enjoy! =)

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